UGH!!! Bi*** you don't know me

OK, so yesterday I was at the register in the cafeteria at my job about to pay for my food when this chick that I haven't seen in GOD knows when comes up and says, "Hey, how have you been?" I said, " I've been great, how about you?". Before I knew it this chick took her nasty ass hands and rubbed my face (A BIG NO NO) talking about "what's all this?" (I'm growing a beard........something different for the Spring).......THEN this girl touches the little bit of stomach that I do have and says, "OMG and when did this happen?"

She pissed me off so much that I almost cussed her out. But I held my tongue and just nodded and smiled. I knew if I would have dug into that ass it wasn't going to be pretty so I left alone.


Fast forward to 15 minutes ago the new receptionist at my job is about to get her plastic ponytail snatched off and thrown across the room if she says something else about me. One of my coworkers came to me and said the receptionist (who make the assumption that I'm gay, nothing confirmed or denied) wants to fix me up with one of her friends.................Bi*** I'm far from lonely, single, or desperate..........and again BI*** YOU DON"T KNOW ME!!!!!